That Pain (Flash Fiction 55)

back to school
no bells, silence
mutual head nods
parent confides
“our son thinks
way too much…”
teacher shrugs
such bully, precautions
unknown inner lives
exhales sift hair
away from sullen eyes
nobody listens
he’s convinced
they won’t understand
tolerance zero, friendless
without ear to hear
that anxious pain
broke more than his nose

55 Fiction (nanofiction)

52 Responses to “That Pain (Flash Fiction 55)”

  1. moondustwriter Says:

    Nice Flash 55 Adam!!!

    ouch I feel the pain (in my nose)

  2. Somebody get Leslie an ice pack STAT! lol
    Thanks 🙂

  3. I absolutely loved your poem. I loved the silence and desolation in it. I loved the depth it implied.

  4. Very much the school experience, Poor boy! Love the poem!

  5. Glad you enjoyed the piece, Gerardine.

    Some kids go through emotional torment all the time. It’s awful, and it bothered me every day when I taught.

  6. I just simply love your poem Adam. I wish that I was young again and back in school hearing the bells ring.

  7. tight 55 adam…at that age we need ears to hear…and bullying needs to stop..

  8. Definately deeper than it appears!!
    Great job.
    Thank you for giving me a heads up, and thanks for playing.
    I also read your previous 55…
    That was excellent as well.
    Please join us again next Friday, and have a Kick Ass Week-End!

    • I will definitely try again next Friday. Thanks for including me G-Man! Enjoying being a part of the 55 Friday 🙂

  9. […] This post was mentioned on Twitter by Adam Dustus. Adam Dustus said: That Pain (Flash Fiction 55): […]

  10. Oh, you are good at this. This one reminds me of Arthur when he was kicked and beat in your novel. Packs a punch of a wake up call to some, I hope.

    • Thanks, Leslie. Glad you see the connection. I hope you’re right about that wake up call. You’re the best for reading H.S. Asylum :)))

  11. are such an expert at this, Adam!
    I have linked you up.
    You are such a great addition!
    Mine is here
    I have three 55 to offer.
    Hope you like them.
    Have you a blessed weekend!

  12. it reminds me a lot of primary school… i really like your poems… 🙂

  13. wow, adam…that was a lot to say in 55 words but you’ve done it powerfully!

  14. the silent kid at the back…sees too much but he gets the last laugh if a writer!
    Gone for a poem this week based on the Etheree form created about twenty years ago by an Arkansas poet named Etheree Taylor Armstrong It normally consists of ten lines of unmetered and unrhymed verse, the first line having one syllable, each succeeding line adding a syllable. I added an extra row for the word count and the punch line. See what I mean here.

    • Look forward to reading your poetry, John. I’m not familiar with that form—will be great to learn about it. Thanks 🙂

  15. You’re good. I could feel that. Well done. Love/ Jo.

  16. wrong link posted in my previous post. See what I mean here.

  17. Awwwwwww, school days. Excellent 55.

    Mine this week is DOUBLE STANDARD As always, scroll down a bit, below my Friday’s Show n Tell.

    Have a super weekend fellow 55’r!!

  18. Thanks, Anni. You have a super weekend as well 🙂

  19. cool 55. bullying definitely needs to be stopped. Mine is up too. Have a great spring weekend.

  20. Kristine, I agree about bullying. Look forward to reading your 55 🙂

  21. You are an amazing writer who gets it right…always! 🙂 Have fun today. My Mom is doing better, so I am happy. 🙂

  22. I’m so happy to hear she is doing better 🙂
    Hang in there. Thanks, Doraz

  23. That last line is outstanding!

  24. Appreciate that. Have a nice weekend!

  25. I have friends that work in the public schools…so this rang…very true to my ears.

  26. When it comes to bullying, my ears ring constantly from what some of my educator friends tell me.

    Have a great weekend, Martin

  27. A strong visual piece. Great 55.

  28. Bullying sometimes has really tragic results. Parents, teachers, and school administrators must step up together and fight it. A few weeks ago, I wrote about a particularly horrifying case of bullying in a piece called Portrait of a Tragedy.

  29. well done Adam.A lovely poem.I still remember the physical punishment and the bullying inflicted on me in primary school.My left hand still bears the trace of a physical agression perpetrated by a female primary teacher.
    now, the situatin is much better here but there’s more room for progress.
    thanks Adam for sharing this great poem.

  30. dustus Says:

    That’s terrible. I’m sorry to hear that, wordwand. You bring up an important point though: bullying is not particular to childhood. Some people unfortunately never grow out of it.

    Appreciate you sharing that classroom experience.

  31. The pain and awkwardness of schooldays – unfortunately we find that they really WERE the best years of our lives 🙂 Great flash fiction (or should that be Flashback unfiction?) 🙂

  32. dustus Says:

    “Flashback unfiction ” Hadn’t thought of it that way. Sounds much more interesting. Well, since I haven’t grown out of awkwardness, maybe my best years are still going on. lol Thanks

  33. nothing is more painful than a friendless childhood- i have been very blessed in case of friends. never wanted more than one at a time, always got her/him.

  34. You’re right… “nothing is more painful than a friendless childhood” So glad that wasn’t the case for you.

    • i am very, very lucky in case of friends. never wanted too many always had very good ones (every law has some exceptions of course).

      life is really bleak without atleast “one” friend at your side.

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