Metaphor Falls (for Poetry Rally)
Life will be better
Accepting it all
Splash screen dreams
Metaphor falls
What may exist?
Blindfolding hints
Dying to live. Well,
That wasn’t it…
Cannot think after
Brief disbelief
I swear my conceit
Delay all perceived…
Godspeed to taking leave
Clear blue sky in which
Pillow clouds lie
Water curtains fly
Mist veiling light
90 degrees, aimless and peeved
Hard to rest these pacing feet
Faith wore pride in cut-off sleeves
Journey being felt indeed
Can never say goodbye in time
Frozen sprays of moisture shine
Soothing like the moment sigh
Glimmer boring tears from eyes
Positive drawing, blood felt wine
Exuberant wishing
Missing
Fine
_______________
Care for a reading?
*photo by me
____________________________________________________
Thanks fo
r including me in this rally!
My nominee(s) for said rally are Lord Emmanuel and wordwand. They’re both fantastic. I just read 2 poems by them, respectively, that floored me:
“How Long” by Lord Emmanuel
“End of Spring” by wordwand
Cheers Jingle, Em, and wordwand
Dustus Blog 
July 1, 2010 at 8:52 am
That’s good, I like the way you get the rhythm in the poem, it gives it a lilting sensation. Very effective ending too.
July 1, 2010 at 9:43 am
Thanks, I like your blog. You write very well.
Appreciate your feedback
July 1, 2010 at 8:55 am
You have got it down and I am smiling at this one. 🙂 Have fun today.
July 1, 2010 at 9:41 am
You’re always smiling, funny lady! lol Great weather today, D. Gonna take the lap top outside in a bit. Having fun, of course 🙂
July 1, 2010 at 9:20 am
That’s a great poem. Flows beautifully.
July 1, 2010 at 9:40 am
Hi Anthony. thanks
July 1, 2010 at 9:42 am
fantastic!
thank you for the nominations!
I will consider very seriously this time!
Cheers!
😉
July 1, 2010 at 9:50 am
Jingle, you rock! No worries 😉 As I put on the award in YOUR honor… “Unity through Blogs” cheers, my friend
July 1, 2010 at 9:51 am
[…] Adam:https://dustus.wordpress.com/2010/07/01/metaphor-falls-for-poetry-rally/ […]
July 1, 2010 at 11:31 am
whooaa…!! lovely poem Adam..
with every post you have me speechless and spellbound and loved the pic 😀
July 1, 2010 at 12:27 pm
Meg, you’re awesome X a million 🙂
cheerios.
July 1, 2010 at 11:48 am
“I swear my conceit
Delay all perceived…”
Sums up many a life on this planet… really!
A poem so honest and true, it has actually rendered me speechless!!! TOO GOOD!
July 1, 2010 at 12:41 pm
thank you, Kavita 🙂
Congrats on your 100th! Enjoyed reading your blog.
July 1, 2010 at 12:03 pm
Great and beautiful work, love it 🙂
July 1, 2010 at 12:44 pm
Very kind of you… Thanks, Marinela 🙂
July 1, 2010 at 1:07 pm
This poem has such a beautiful flow…the 4th verse is especially smooth and lovely… I think we right ourselves in the words write… also great imagery
in this one… thanks again for sharing. Heartspell
July 1, 2010 at 1:28 pm
Thought provoking… “I think we right ourselves in the words write…” Guess it’s part of being a writer, or not. I’m not sure. I’d like to not believe in vindication, but all the writing I do suggests otherwise. Thanks, heartspell. You’re thought-provoking in both posts and commentary. Thanks for taking the time to do all that. cheers
July 1, 2010 at 9:04 pm
Should have been …I think we right ourselves in the words WE write…sorry for the typo. As if in the process, we figure ourselves out or get to know ourselves better, from the purging of what’s closest to our hearts… maybe this is too much blah, blah, blah… run-on words now slowing down to a cool-down…:) Heartspell
July 1, 2010 at 3:03 pm
Interesting –metaphor love your use of descriptives and comparatives. Your words flow out as powerful as the water in the spray of that fountain.
Read it through a couple of times.
Joanny
July 1, 2010 at 3:42 pm
That’s cool description, Joanny. Thanks for the re-reads as well. Appreciate your encouragement. cheers
July 1, 2010 at 3:29 pm
everybody already told you you got wicked flow, but its true. love th imagery as well…the line that got me “faith wore pride in cut-off sleeves”…nice.
July 1, 2010 at 3:56 pm
Thanks, brian. Always appreciate your comments. Have an awesome 4th!
July 1, 2010 at 4:06 pm
you really write some of the best poems i have ever read….. amazing!!!!
July 1, 2010 at 4:46 pm
I’m grateful, ishabelle 🙂 Extremely kind of you. Many thanks!
July 1, 2010 at 5:07 pm
Such a fun poem…really enjoyed reading it and hearing you read it…I like the way you played with the words.
July 1, 2010 at 7:10 pm
It’s funny, Charles, almost every time I go to record a new one I wind up editing it different than originally written. It’s changing my entire approach to poetry writing.
Your readings inspire.
July 1, 2010 at 5:56 pm
Your voice is just amazing…so very creative and with beautiful flow. As always, you leave me speechkess! 🙂
July 1, 2010 at 7:11 pm
Your comments always leave me smiling 🙂
July 1, 2010 at 7:00 pm
What a cool poem adam.
July 1, 2010 at 7:14 pm
Thanks, K. Always value your creative opinions.
July 1, 2010 at 7:14 pm
i enjoyed both the word choice and structure in this piece. i loved the images that flashed through my mind as i read your words : )
thank you always for your kind encouragement and comments. i’m glad that we have a community member as supportive and contributive as you ~
July 1, 2010 at 7:39 pm
Thanks, Samantha. I enjoy your poetry and especially appreciate the supportive community comment 🙂 cheers
July 1, 2010 at 7:36 pm
Hello…thanks for stopping by my blog! I enjoyed your poem and you’re cute too!
July 1, 2010 at 7:42 pm
Aww shucks… lol thanks for the visit 🙂
July 1, 2010 at 8:39 pm
that flow very nicely.. specially hearing you reading it Adam 🙂
July 2, 2010 at 7:39 am
Thanks for visiting, Noha 🙂 Hope all is well. cheers
July 1, 2010 at 8:44 pm
90 degrees, aimless and peeved
Hard to rest these pacing feet
Faith wore pride in cut-off sleeves
Journey being felt indeed – quite descriptive , fabulous!
July 2, 2010 at 7:43 am
🙂 Value your feedback, suzicate.
Enjoy the 4th!
July 1, 2010 at 10:31 pm
love all the metophors – favorite line
“Faith worn pride in cut-off sleeves” love it…bkm
I have moved….
http://signedbkm.blogspot.com
July 2, 2010 at 7:41 am
Thanks for dropping that link and for the comment. cheers
July 2, 2010 at 4:07 am
A beautiful poem…You always know your way around with words that just sends the message home…and the picture you attached is really lovely.
Thanks for the nomination….It means a lot to me…Cheers!!!
July 2, 2010 at 7:35 am
You deserve it, my friend.
cheers
July 2, 2010 at 5:19 am
A great read, well spoken.
July 2, 2010 at 7:36 am
Thanks, Cin. Glad you like it.
July 2, 2010 at 6:16 am
this is so very beautiful. 🙂
very soothing and peaceful, why i dont know but thats the feeling which came to my mind.
you have nominated two of the very best human beings in our group.
🙂
July 2, 2010 at 7:47 am
trisha 🙂
Maybe the water image helps to soothe. It does for me.
definitely, 2 great human beings were nominated. That makes 3 in a row—after I nominated you the week prior 🙂
cheers
July 2, 2010 at 9:24 am
‘Splash screen dreams’ love it! The sight of that cool squirting water made me yarn to leap in to cool down Adam!
I love this verse;-
Clear blue sky in which
Pillow clouds lie
Water curtains fly
Mist veiling light
Excellence is what I have come to expect from you and I’m never disappointed! Great post with a very appropriate image!
July 3, 2010 at 7:27 am
I didn’t leap in, but did sit with my feet in for a little while. lol
Thanks, Lynda 🙂
July 2, 2010 at 11:29 am
Adam,
“blood felt wine”
Nice.
Rhyme on!
Tim Keeton
(Undead)Poet / Wizard / Teller-of-tales
July 3, 2010 at 7:28 am
Thanks and Rhyme On, Tim!
July 2, 2010 at 12:40 pm
week 24 the perfect poet award…
enjoy!
July 3, 2010 at 7:30 am
Thanks! Gr8t rally once again.
😉 10Q Jingle
July 2, 2010 at 4:02 pm
the last 3 lines are fabulous1 Well written!
http://mairmusic.wordpress.com/
July 3, 2010 at 7:31 am
Thanks, M. I felt like screaming those last 3 lines at one point, but glad I refrained from doing so. Glad you like it.
July 2, 2010 at 5:31 pm
Congratulations for winnng the Award 🙂
July 3, 2010 at 7:35 am
Thanks. Have an awesome weekend, buttercup! 🙂
July 2, 2010 at 5:54 pm
Very well written. Loved this! And a congratulations on your award (well deserved) ~ Fantastic blog as well! Hope to view now and again as I can…wonderful writing! ~April
July 3, 2010 at 7:36 am
Appreciate it, April. Let me know your feedback anytime 🙂
July 2, 2010 at 11:19 pm
I absolutely love that last grouping that begins “Can never say good-bye in time” . That grouping, alone, is enough. The feeling I get from it, sums up everything else for me. You are so good. 🙂
July 3, 2010 at 7:38 am
I try to write as well as you paint 🙂
Have an awesome weekend, Leslie!
July 3, 2010 at 12:16 pm
outstanding job this week.
😉
enjoy a festive weekend!
Happy July 4th!
July 3, 2010 at 2:23 pm
Wow! the more I read it the deeper it gets. Perfect title, I love this it really flows. No wonder you have so many comments, I agree with the people!! Great. thanks, alan
July 3, 2010 at 4:45 pm
Very cool of you, Alan. Glad you like the poem. Comments help me figure out how to improve lines. I’m fortunate to get this much feedback.
Cheers 🙂
July 3, 2010 at 2:31 pm
You too, Jingle! Enjoy the 4th!
cheers 😉
Thanks for everything
July 3, 2010 at 2:46 pm
Also meant to say have a happy 4th! Reading the poetry, I was clouded in “metaphors” and “exuberant wishing” something else to ponder upon. I almost forgot where I was. =)) …Happy writing cheers as well…and have a safe holiday!
July 3, 2010 at 3:07 pm
Thanks, April. Have a happy and safe 4th too! Enjoy.
July 3, 2010 at 9:07 pm
http://itistimetothinkformyself.blogspot.com/2010/07/jingles-july-follower-awards-happy-4th.html
AWARDS,
PLEASE PICK 2 TO 5 TO ACCEPT,
THANK YOU!
July 4, 2010 at 7:11 am
Thanks! My next post will be my 350th, which is almost as many pages as my novel. I’d like to celebrate it by posting the rally awards. Hope you have a great 4th, Jingle! 😉
cheers
July 4, 2010 at 9:33 am
Really loved the flow of this poem; the rhyme helped to move the poem forward until the last lines which were pitched just perfect. Great poem.
July 5, 2010 at 6:51 am
i absolutely love the rhythm in ur poem…great job
July 5, 2010 at 8:57 am
Thank you 🙂
July 5, 2010 at 8:34 am
Absolutely loved it. Great images and great rhyme. Felt myself in it as I read…Thanks
July 5, 2010 at 8:58 am
Thanks, glad you enjoyed it.
cheers
July 7, 2010 at 8:18 pm
I appreciate how you work with rhythm and line length. Solid writing. Thanks – Bill
July 8, 2010 at 8:15 am
Thanks, Bill. Appreciate your comment.
cheers
July 8, 2010 at 2:04 pm
Hi Adam,
that was a wonderful poem with great lines and imagery..
Especially liked the line” Faith wore pride in cut off sleeves”
Keep writing!
Cheers
July 20, 2010 at 9:13 am
http://thursdaypoetsrallypoetry.wordpress.com/2010/07/19/the-celebrate-poet-of-june-award-plus-poetry-community-award/
a poetry award,
two general,
Thanks!
😉
September 13, 2010 at 12:43 pm
Beautiful flow of thoughts.. carefully chosen rhythm.. Loved reading this one- 🙂