We had chemistry ninth period under sweaty florescence and mutual distraction. My heart spun centrifuge-like into exhausted dreams of Katie. Standing on her parents’ porch, I approach in slow-motion. Her freckled smile, glistening chestnut eyes, smelling strawberry Jolly Rancher, auburn hair tangled and sun kissed. I stuttered. Nerves trembling when she said she loved me too.
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*The above flash 55 was just written for One Stop Poetry’s Sunday Picture Prompt Challenge. Check it out! Everyone is always welcome to play along with the challenges. Thank you. Also, One Stop has been nominated for Shorty Awards in both the #art and #poetry categories.
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This entry was posted on January 16, 2011 at 12:04 am and is filed under Flash Fiction, Image Poetry, One Shoot, One Stop Poetry with tags Blog, dustus, love poem, One Shoot Sunday, One Stop Poetry, poet, Poetry, poetry online. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed.
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January 16, 2011 at 12:59 am
“mutual distraction”
I love it!!
January 16, 2011 at 1:42 am
Thanks Dani. Enjoy the rest of your weekend 🙂
January 16, 2011 at 1:18 am
[…] This post was mentioned on Twitter by Adam Dustus. Adam Dustus said: She Loved Me Too (Flash Fiction 55 — One Stop Poetry Challenge): http://wp.me/pnd9L-21M […]
January 16, 2011 at 2:53 am
it feels great when love is reciprocated in the same way … beautiful write.
January 16, 2011 at 4:14 am
she loved me too *sigh!
January 16, 2011 at 5:23 am
{sigh} so good Adam!
January 16, 2011 at 6:15 am
This is so wonderfully innocent and romantic. Lovely.
January 16, 2011 at 7:57 am
Old romance, such beauty
January 16, 2011 at 7:57 am
hot dude…second one of the one shoots that took me back to HS…freckles and all…and yeah i still get those nerves…i played this week!
January 16, 2011 at 8:24 am
oh adam – this was beautiful and evocative…her freckled smile, glistening chestnut eyes… and you have strawberries as well….lovely
January 16, 2011 at 8:32 am
a lovely poem. i love “her freckled smile”.
January 16, 2011 at 8:33 am
She lied. She just wanted your chemistry homework. After you left, I gave her my geometry homework.
January 16, 2011 at 10:27 am
LOL… that would have caused her to also fail, though she probably would have aced geometry. 🙂
January 16, 2011 at 8:35 am
Oh, does this bring back memories. Except I had chemistry in 11th grade.
That first tasteof first love. Nice one, Adam.
January 16, 2011 at 8:35 am
Talk about taking us back to high school, and that was many moons ago for me, but, I was right back there, in an instant.
January 16, 2011 at 9:31 am
Now that was right on. High school nuance personified. excellent.
January 16, 2011 at 11:40 am
Awww, this is so sweet!
January 16, 2011 at 11:43 am
Life love, hope, future despair in so few words.
January 16, 2011 at 11:46 am
Love the mutual distraction beyond the image, the strawberry Jolly Rancher scents and sun kissed. Nice thoughts of yesteryear.
January 16, 2011 at 11:56 am
This was a fantastic effort. It does just what the challenge calls for. Good work.
January 16, 2011 at 12:08 pm
Aw! I love this. She sounds like the perfect girlnextdoor.
January 16, 2011 at 12:54 pm
…”I approach in slow motion”… Yes, high school (or middle school these days!) all over again. Love it.
January 16, 2011 at 1:34 pm
Aw….so sweet and the jolly rancher just brought it to life for me!
January 16, 2011 at 2:05 pm
I like the 55 format here, Adam–it worked out really well for this little trip back to chemistry class, and those first independent chemistry experiments, which as I recall were always more fun. Lots of endorphins and good writing in this one shoot.
January 16, 2011 at 2:14 pm
hummmmm simply LOVEly dustus!
January 16, 2011 at 4:19 pm
I really enjoyed reading this. Love the line, “My heart spun centrifuge-like…” It brought back memories of times I have felt like that. Thank you for sharing.
January 16, 2011 at 6:07 pm
O what a beautiful moment drowning in teenage questions and dreams!
January 16, 2011 at 7:43 pm
I love it! I also got twitter today, please follow me. My username is MsMatsui
January 16, 2011 at 10:00 pm
❤ this. I could remember being 14 and all trembly-nervous in love again.
January 16, 2011 at 10:09 pm
When distractions are mutual, things become more focused..
January 16, 2011 at 11:31 pm
Ah…this is just brilliant writing…first love defined.
January 16, 2011 at 11:50 pm
Nice shot, Adam! And using those chemistry classes, too–brilliant hint at the ‘chemistry’ going on, those adrenaline flushes from hormone spurts. Don’t everyone recall this? And isn’t the purity of those times nostalgic? And you’ve got it all in one ‘flash’! Thanks for sharing!
January 17, 2011 at 1:09 am
Nostalgic high school…ah yes…back to the young days of romance. So sweet, so silly – sounds like certain daydreams from back in the day, certainly. It’s that clumsy, uncertain first love that we always look back on with a smile…nicely done, Adam.
January 17, 2011 at 1:24 am
Took me back!
January 17, 2011 at 2:52 am
One sometimes lives to hear just these words and the lucky ones get to hear it too’I love you too’ great flash55
January 22, 2011 at 6:47 pm
Very beautiful poem, and well written.
January 23, 2011 at 8:55 pm
fantastic .. rich in imagery and magic. Very evocative 🙂