Great take Dustus…the opposites …agreed with stated comments…sounds like one finally let go of a relationship that clearly was not healthy for them….and like April said…keep those feet solid.. there is a lot of hot air floating around…bkm
Nice one! Love the title, made me smile and consider many things, but ultimately, the write led me to where I was supposed to go, concluding the last place you should be is chained to any wrist. Expect the unexpected, loved it.
It’s about time someone wrote the balloon’s POV here. I almost did, but it was…lame. I really like the attitude here, my friend, especially that cut about the other levitating as you deflate–definitely watched that happen. Excellent finish, too.
I really enjoyed this poem, Adam. I really like the ambiguity of the line “Away with you!” It works finishing the line before it and as an independent line, and it has implications for the overall meaning either way! Very nice! Thank you for stopping by and commenting on my site this past Wednesday.
I love the viewpoint you chose for this monologue – the voice of the poor lame balloon… but as I read on, I realized it was not the balloon at all, just someone who feels like the helium has gone from his life, now his lover has moved on. Loss is so painfully felt, when the words are heard in your spoken voice. Thanks for a great One Shoot.
Ha! The ending stanza really made a nice ending twist – added a grin of pride and amusement. Some people, they just drag you down…no need to stay attached as such if all they’re doing is bringing you down…lame balloon indeed! Fun little piece…now go out and get something better than a lemon my friend!
Wow-quite an unexpected take on the prompt! I always appreciate a poem that takes me somewhere unexpected and yours definitely did! Great imagery with the ups and downs. I’ll have the phrase “lame balloon” in my head for a while. But now I’m questioning my own perception–I just wrote something about the balloon being green (kinda limey). Hmmm
Thank you. Glad you stopped by. I tried to leave comment on your blog, but was getting a 503 message. Liked what you did with the prompt! Wrote a long comment, that was then lost because of the error😦
Yellow or Green. I actually thought about it. And it was bothering me. I then let Photoshop decide objectively. Sampling the balloon string turned up yellow. The glowing fringe of the balloon seems yellow yet it’s bulk greenish. My guess is the light is messing with it a bit—perhaps back fence in combo with frosted material. IDK lol Yes, I’m a dork and it does look green