Call Her Nike – #FridayFlash


7 1/2-year-old soccer uniformed Titan. She thumb-twiddles texting opposite Dad’s dividing laptop. His scream on call, “I lost $400,000 in equity!”

“Dad, my game…”

Ignoring daughter, insults ensue; breakfasters cringe…

“Stop whining…” He orders daughter, “Take my tray!”

“But, Daaaad… I don’t know where it goes.”

“Quit being a goddamn baby, and just do it!”

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Care for a Flash Fiction Reading?
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If you or anyone you know has written a Friday Flash 55 Fiction piece (in 55 words), then please come tell G-Man.

36 Responses to “Call Her Nike – #FridayFlash”

  1. Had to un-grit my teeth just now. Something tells me that these fifty-five words are not fiction for many little Titans. Fierce dialogue crisply relayed, Dustus.

  2. Drop that laptop, Daddydear, or suffer these spikes up your rear.
    Poor girl. This is a common, sad scene around here.
    Fantastically told, Dustus.

  3. Very realistic, heart-breaking 55. Nicely penned.

  4. Ass. (not you)

    You really pulled the emotion out on this one. I wanted to punch that guy in the throat.

  5. Not a happy family.

  6. A Trickle down effect of Anger!
    I felt the emotion here, Even more when you listen.
    Most Excellent 55 Adam.
    Your support is greatly appreciated, I hope that Friday 55 is firmly ensconced in your weekly things to look foreward to, rather than just doing a writing prompt. Have a Kick Ass Week-End…G

    • I enjoy writing and recording 55’s very much, G… plus photoshopping is fun. Kick Ass weekend back atcha

  7. Oh that was so very sad. And probably happens more than we know. A very good write!

  8. The father’s an ass! I felt for the girl. Really good!

  9. ugh. i think i know this jerk…i mean dad…

  10. Yes, witnessed similar situations. Disgusting.

  11. Well written and well read.
    A disturbing moment, framed and encapsulated.

    For some reason your voice sounds exactly the way I imagined. (!)
    🙂

  12. The opening line is the strongest, a good grip on ironic contrast takes us in. Hope Mom’s a little better.

  13. A sad state of affairs and he probably doesn’t even see it. You give it great emotion in your reading Adam. Bittersweet 55

  14. If I were the little Titan, I’d run on my fleet feet as far as I could get from Pappy.

  15. This touched too close to home. It sent chills down my spine.

    Click here to check my 55 out

  16. This hurt..!
    Very well written this disturbing pattern in 55..

    Hugs x

  17. Nobody is perfect, but seriously?! Cellphones and Laptops need to be put away sometimes.😦 Sad story but great 55.

  18. yearzerowriters Says:

    Great reading. Love the echo effect

    marc nash

  19. I wish that I could punch that guy!

    Well done!

  20. Ah – some real Flash Fiction.

    Good stuff, savage.

  21. Yikes! Hope someone in this child’s life has softer edges…

    Fabulous 55, Dustus.

  22. He’s obviously forgotten who’s going to pick out his nursing home–and support him after he loses all the rest of his investments. Or not. What a freakin jerk. adam, you bring it all to life, the waste and the sadness and the total self-absorption. Excellent 55.

  23. Oh…this one is quite sad…but very well developed.

  24. It made me feel arrrrrrrrrrrrrgh.

    I guess thats what you were aiming for.

    it worked.🙂

  25. Ahhh, 400 grand comes, it goes.🙂

    I cringed too. Ya done good.

    xo

  26. Poor little Nike … she doesn’t deserve any of it!!!

  27. This reminds me of that old Harry Chapin song, Cat’s in the Cradle.

    “I’m gonna be like you, Dad.
    You know I’m gonna be like you.”

    Sad, and too true, I fear.

  28. I don’t think this is fiction but cold hard fact for too many. You did it so well in 55 words. What is $400,000 to this little athlete?

    My 55 is at:

    http://rnsane.blogspot.com/2011/04/friday-flash-55-those-were-days-april.html

  29. Sad that this rings so true. Good that it’s so well written!

    Have a great weekend!

  30. libraryscene Says:

    damn..nicely done…terribly clever..I wonder which came first, last line or title? most excellent 55 ~

  31. YOU SON OF BBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBB wow that made me mad

  32. So sad that there are too many fathers like that……….

  33. I’ll bet he was a “gentle discipliner,” too – one of those f**ktards who tells parents NOT to EVER spank their kids, while he screams verbal abuse at his kid, thinking he’s not damaging her in a worse way.

  34. And he’ll probably wonder why, after buying her the very best of everything, she doesn’t have time for HIM when he’s in his twilight years…

  35. One has to wonder who’s being a baby in this scenario. A cringe-worthy 55.

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